Thursday, June 15, 2006

World Cup

Ok I am pissed. I just watched the world cup matches tonight and quafed a superb amount of wine but I need this question answered, why the fuck ITV why the fuck. You are notoriously shit at the football, big games everyone turns away and tunes into bbc one but for some reason you think its because your presenters do not have the gravitas. The real reason is because any opportunity you go to an ad-break and you finish the program too quickly. Admittidley your pundits are pretty poor, but no worse than the beeb and you do not have Gary "I am too busy thinking of a weak pun to ask a proper question of Hansen so he can whitter on and talk slowly to everyone else" Linekar but for fucks sake do not put Steve Ryder in our faces, I can tolerate his "I have a parting" dullness but everytime I speak I think he is about to say "this could be Colin Montgomery's big chance to win a major/Rhona Cameron and the rest of the curling team will be watching with baited breath". He is Doogie Donnely without the accent, a man who things its dangerous to put his CDs on random, Alan Partridge without the post ironic glee. In short an analy retentive wank stain. Why ITV why do you promote this schmuck when you have Gabby, a normal woman, a woman who 99.9% of blokes watching would shag if it was not for the slightly broad shoulders, who understands the game, asks the right questions of the panel and frankly does not distract from the game with bizare personality flaws. Especialy during this wold cup where every right thinking football fan wants rid of their own personal Steve Ryders, the ametuer fan who only comes out at the big tornement, takes up all the room during the communal watching, shouts the loudest but never shows for the rest of the season.
Gabby, I respect ya, Lineker and Ryder, fuck off back to your travel lodge.

Rant over not sure how much sense that made.
World Cup Dream Pundit/Commentator lineup.
Host - Gabby Logan
Commentator. Motty
co-Commentator Gavin Peackock
Red Button - Steve Claridge and Steve Bunce
Pundit 1. Big Sam (tactics)
Pundit 2. Martin O'Neil (Weirdness)
Pundit 3. Toss up between Jack Charlton and Che Nevile

Roving Reporter James Richardson

Plus Leonardo.....for the Ladies ding dong elbow in the face

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