Bloody;APPLES!

The supermarkets in spain sell mis-shaped apples or so I was told, in fact I am not even sure there is a Spain at the moment.
I have had one of those health scares so I am doubting everything. You know bit of blood on your toilet paper and you think you have bowel cancer but you just hope it goes away as,
A)I am too young to die
and
B) I can not be bothered going to the doctors as I am a bloke and that is what we do.

Well back to the apples and enough about bloody poo's or hopefully
blood on the poo not in the poo (courtesy of the online medical journal). The implication was the apples were tastier because theS were not apple shaped so if that is true why is an apple shape not like the ones in spain all miss-shaped and..,
sorry back to my arse, gay people and adventurous ladies must bleed too so its no big dealio, just a moment of worry, but I have been tired a lot recently so it could be cancer but as I say I can't be bothered being bald and a charity case and if I am hospitalised with it I don't want to be visited with people being nice and stuff. Apples andway, yeah, how can they be tastier if they are a different shape,
if I eat a bag of crisps and eat the weird shaped ones they do not taste any different but I bet if I picked them out, put them in a bowl and kept the perfect ones for myself, I could sell the duds as "healthier lifestyle crisps" and afford to inflate my price and just have free perfect crisps just for me. Maybe I should stop watching Doc Martin